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Dispatches to a sister (4/25/2011)

April 26, 2011

Mom said you were asking about me last night. She seemed concerned about this and mentioned it approximately 400 times while I was trying to get her to help me understand an insurance snafu. I assume you were deeply concerned for my well-being. Do not fret, dear sister, I am alive and well. For Easter I ordered out Chinese food which arrived in a record-breaking 15 minutes.

I am in the middle of writing an essay about how college is a strange recursive process between growing up and complete and total regression and that perhaps that’s all growth is anyway. Did I mention I wrote an essay about what happens after graduation that I submitted to the [redacted] blog… they haven’t gotten back… probably because of the part where I said you’ll move home and have a shitty job. As the philosopher Beyonce once said, I don’t think they’re ready for this jelly.

Oh and I have an interview for an English teacher position at [our high school] on Thursday. Principal says with this wry chuckle, “I have a feeling you know how to get here.” I said, “Yes, I’ve been there a couple of times.” Oh ho ho, what a hoot! We’re practically bosom buddies already! Living the dream, am I right? In other news, the sinking ennui that has filled my life for 25 years has been overcome by terror at the (now almost undeniable) fact that I will die in either mom and dad’s house or at our high school (God rest my soul).
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Things not mentioned that are a big friggin deal to me right now: the giant zit on my cheek (wtf, 25 years old and still zitastic), the Friday Night Lights series finale (RIP), new pillow, owing $250 to Washington, DC in unpaid parking tickets, and my final week of school.
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